Until We Meet Again
by JensensMisses
Summary: Kelly is stuggling to cope with Andys death and to make matters worse it's Andys birthday, the first one since he's died. How long until something goes wrong? And who will be there to help Kelly realise that some things he just can't control?
1. Chapter 1

**So here's another story I had started to write on my laptop ages ago, I found it recently and after altering it a little I thought I'd upload and see what you awesome people think of it. Obviously it's quite old as I'm mentioning the death of Andy and his first birthday since he's died but I hope you still like it. I am working on another Chicago Fire story at the minute but I'm not happy with it yet so if you don't like this one maybe you'll like the next. Anyway's enough with the rambling on...**

**I own nothing... unfortunately**

_"You should've vented the back" Casey said heading back towards the firestation._

_"We're called the rescue squad Casey, we don't vent. You shouldn't have put Andy through the window"_ Severide argued back watching as Matthew Casey shook his head. _"I don't have to explain myself to you, I sleep like a baby. You?"_

Kelly tossed and turned in his bed. Dreams of the day Andy Darden had burned to death and the argument he and Casey had had at the fire station were haunting him. It had been months since the fatal accident but Andys birthday was today and the nightmares had started again. He sat up in bed not missing how clammy his body felt, throwing the covers off of him he got out of bed and went downstairs. The clock stating it was only 3:10 am. _Too early to be up_ he thought running a hand down his face. He headed for the refrigerator and drank some juice from the carton before sitting at the table.

That's where Shay found him three hours later. She crept over to her sleeping friend and gently nudged his shoulder. Kelly awoke with a jump. "Hey, I didn't mean to scare you" Shay said holding her hands up and taking a step back.

Kelly rubbed his hands down his face. "I didn't mean to scare you" he said smiling at her.

Shay smiled back and rested her hand on her friends arm. "Still having the dreams huh?"

"I just wanna get his birthday over with, they'll probably stop then"

Shay raised her eyebrows. "Get it over with?" she asked walking to the refrigerator. "You're still going to the little get together right?"

"They wanna celebrate, what're we meant to be celebrating exactly?" Kelly stood up making his way towards the stairs.

Shay turned around. "You celebrate his life; you share memories with people he loved, people who loved him".

Severide stopped halfway up the staircase turning around. "You can't celebrate the birthday of someone who's dead" He continued up the stairs.

Shay stood with the milk in her hand, staring at the empty space where her friend had stood seconds ago. She couldn't believe what Kelly had said about Andy. They had been best friends for years. She put it down to lack of sleep and placed the milk on the counter. She was tempted to follow him but decided he needed his space, _give him time and talk to him at work_ she thought.

C.F.

Kelly arrived at work half an hour early and went straight to the gym. He dropped his bag on the floor and grabbed the boxing gloves from their peg before putting them on. He headed straight for the punching bag and hit it with all the energy he could muster. Every time he thought of the day Andy died his punches got harder, he could feel the sweat pouring from his body, his arms ached but still he hit the bag.

"Something on your mind?" Chief Boden asked from the doorway, arms folded.

He stopped punching the bag but did not turn around. "Not anymore" Kelly said breathlessly. Boden nodded and walked away.

Kelly hit the bag one last time as hard as he could and watched as it swung back and forth. He removed the gloves and replaced them on the peg, grabbed his bag and made his way to the showers. Ignoring the looks he received as he passed through the locker area.

Matthew Casey watched as Kelly walked past and headed for the showers. He didn't miss the look on Severides face. The one he'd worn for the last week, he knew it was about Andy as he'd seen that look on his own face knowing that his birthday was coming up.

"Did Kelly just pass through here?" Shay asked Matt.

"Um, yeah he's gone in the shower. Everything ok?" Casey asked knowing it wasn't.

"He's been having nightmares about Andy the past week and he hasn't been sleeping much".

"Have you spoken to him about it?" Matt asked concerned.

"I've tried. But you know Kelly, at the mention of sharing feelings he's out of the room like lightening. I dunno what to do". Shay sighed.

"Want me to talk to him?"

"You can try" Shay shrugged knowing it would most likely be a waste of breath with Casey even trying.

"I'll offer him a few beers that should get him talking" Casey smiled.

C.F.

The hot water felt good running down his body, he felt his muscles relaxing slowly and felt a lot better than he had that morning. He stepped out, quickly towelled his body over and got his uniform on. Pushing a hand back through his hair and looking in the mirror. His reflection mirrored how he felt inside and he knew people would be asking him questions about what was wrong but there was no time to do anything as the alarm sounded.

Truck 81, ambulance 61, squad 3 …

The trucks arrived at the accident in quick time. Kelly jumped from the truck and took in the scene in front of him, a factory fire that was quickly becoming out of control. He looked over at Casey who was talking to someone who worked there.

"Casey you go through the front, Severide go around the back. We've been informed there are still people in there" Chief Boden told the two Lieutenants.

They set to work as quickly as possible. Kelly stepped back as the heat hit him instantly, he scanned the room for any injured workers.

"Fire Department, call out!" Kelly shouted, listening for any cries for help. Hearing and seeing no-one he went towards an office opposite. The flames were quickly getting worse. "Fire Department, call out!" He shouted again scanning the room. He caught sight of a body on the floor and rushed towards it. Severide noticed just how big the man was as he got closer. He checked for a pulse and found it was fast. He spoke into his radio. "Chief I got a man here on the first floor. I ain't gonna be able to carry him myself"

Chief Boden listened carefully as Severide spoke. He looked over and saw Casey taking someone over to Shay and Dawson. "Casey! Severides found someone but he needs your help"

"On it Chief!" Casey called back as he headed towards where Kelly had gone. He entered the building and saw how bad the flames were. "Severide!" He called trying to find which room his friend was in.

"In here!" Kelly choked out.

Matt ran into the room and took in the scene in front of him. Kelly had taken his mask off, had placed it over the 400lb mans face and was trying to drag him towards the door. He ran to Kellys side and tried to place his mask on Severides face but Kelly pushed it away.

"We gotta.. get him.. outta here" Kelly wheezed.

Matt looked at the man and checked for a pulse but couldn't feel one. He looked at Kelly and shook his head. "He's dead" He said grabbing the mask from the mans face and handing it back to Kelly.

Severide looked at the man in shock. "No.. he's alive! Check.. again.. Matt!" Kelly was becoming furious. He went to check the mans pulse again but Matt grabbed him.

"We're getting out of here now!" Casey yelled as he pulled Kelly towards the door. The flames were weakening the structure and they had to get out of there quickly.

Kelly watched in shock as the mans body caught on fire. He let Matt drag him away and when he finally felt the cool air hit him he fell to his knees choking. He let the mask fall on the floor.

Boden rushed over to Kelly when he noticed the mask wasn't on his face. "Severide!" He called seeing the lieutenant on his knees.

Casey grabbed Kellys face and looked at him. "Hey, you okay? Breathe, you're gonna be fine" He told him, though he couldn't hide the panic in his voice.

Chief Boden reached Kellys side and saw him closing his eyes. "Stay awake, you hear me Kelly? You have to stay awake. Get Dawson and Shay here!"

"They left for the hospital Chief, another ambulance is on the way" Peter Mills said, worry in his voice.

Kelly tried to keep his eyes open but couldn't. He was struggling to get air into his lungs and he could feel the onset of a panic attack. _Last thing I need_ he thought trying to concentrate on anything other than his breathing. _He was alive_. Great, now he was thinking about the man he'd just tried to save. His breathing felt like it was getting worse. He felt someone's hands on his chest, then someone checking his pulse. He was on his back now. He tried one more time to open his eyes, happy when he finally saw some light. _"What are you doing Severide?"_ He heard a voice ask and as his vision cleared he saw him, his arms crossed, frowning. "Andy" Was the last word Severide said before he lost consciousness completely.


	2. Chapter 2

**So second chapter and it's only short but I wanted to keep this separate from the next chapter. This will only be a short story and I hope I'm not boring anybody.**

_"Wow this is the last place I expected to find you." _Kelly looked around for the voice he'd recognised earlier, he knew who it sounded like but it was impossible. Andy was dead. "_Or not, I mean you were always a little reckless." _Kelly forced his eyes open and saw nothing but a bright light, there was a constant high pitched beeping noise in the background but all he could focus on was the voice. "_You've been a fire fighter for how long now and you still refuse to follow the rules, you never take your mask off. Never." _Kelly finally saw a figure appear in front of him again. "Andy?" He asked his voice shaky.

_"The one and only." _Andy appeared in full form, arms still crossed but with a smile on his face.

Kelly felt himself choke up. "But how are…"

_"Shhh!" _Andy held his finger to his lips. _"It doesn't matter how, you hear that beeping noise? That noise means you're not dead. So don't go panicking on me. You're in an unconscious state and it's the only way I can speak to you so just listen carefully... I don't wanna ever see you like this again, you look awful by the way." _He smiled. _"I don't want you coming out of this blaming Matt for not being able to save that man, yes it's your job, it was my job and I felt the same obligation as you. But you know it was too late, you knew even before you felt for a pulse that he wasn't going to make it out of there alive. You just didn't want to believe he was dead. You didn't want to believe you'd failed and you didn't want to leave him in there dead or not right? Promise me you won't blame yourself or Matt for this, we all know where blame gets us and I know how you feel about today; I've sat by you when you've had those dreams. Tried to tell you to let it go. You can't change any of it Kel, sucks, but it's true. I want you to celebrate my birthday the way you would if I was there, have a laugh, remember me to my kids, tell them stories about the things we got up to when we were their age. Do it because I can't. Don't go hiding away, not today, for once I wanna look down and see the people I love in the same room enjoying themselves."_

"How? How can we enjoy ourselves when the person we love, the person we're there for can't be there with us?" Severide asked, tears falling down his cheeks.

Andy shook his head and smiled. _"Who said I wasn't gonna be there? Who said I ever truly left?"_

Kelly swallowed. "The dreams…"

_"Will stop as soon as you learn to let go of the past." _Andy finished his sentence and came closer to Kelly placing a hand on his chest. _"Now get outta here, if you don't get well soon you're gonna miss my party and I can't have that." _

Kelly watched as Andy became less clear, his vision blurring and the touch he felt from Andy disappeared slowly.

_"Tell Heather and the boys I love them and don't let me catch you anywhere near here again, at least until you're a hundred years old." _Kelly laughed. _"Take care my brother, I love you."_

**So... review? :D**


	3. Chapter 3

**This took me longer than I expected so I apologise about that. I'm not very good at writing hospital scenes so I hope this doesn't disappoint anyone. I know nothing about medical equipment or what would happen to someone in Kellys condition but I tried my best. This chapter's a little slow but bear with me, the next one will hopefully be better.**

**Let me know what you think. Eek! **

**Thanks to everyone who's read this story so far. I appreciate it.**

"Tell_ Heather and the boys I love them and don't let me catch you anywhere near here again, at least until you're a hundred years old." _Kelly laughed. _"Take care my brother, I love you."_

As soon as Kelly heard those final words the light went out, the beeping became louder and he was suddenly aware of a mask over his nose and mouth. He felt a hand grip his shoulder tight, somehow he knew it was Matt.

"It's okay, Kelly you're okay." That was definitely Shay; he felt her wipe a tear from his face and suddenly felt embarrassed realising he'd cried in real life and not just in his dream. Or was it a dream? _It felt real enough. _He thought frowning.

"Kelly? Can you hear us?" Matt asked releasing his grip on his shoulder slightly.

Kelly tried to speak but it sounded more like a deep moan. He frowned again through frustration.

"Mr Severide? If you can hear me squeeze my hand." He felt a hand lightly rest in his and he managed to give a small squeeze in reply. "Excellent. Now as you're awake do you think you can open your eyes for me?" The voice asked calmingly. Kelly focused on opening his eyes, closing them tightly again when the small amount of light burned his retinas. "That's good. Come on, one more try." Kelly did as he was told, he managed to open them more this time and noticed the light from before had been turned in the opposite direction. Slowly a doctor came into view with a big smile on his face. "Mr Severide, happy to have you back and I know I'm not the only one." The doctor said moving aside to reveal Matt and Shay both with huge smiles on their faces. Kelly smiled back, happy to see his friends. The doctor took Kellys oxygen mask and offered him a few ice chips to soothe his throat which felt like heaven.

"How are you feeling?" The doctor asked him.

Kelly cleared his throat before talking. "Tired."

The doctor smiled. "Well you were unconscious for quite some time but your brain is functioning normally so I wouldn't let it worry you. Sometimes the body needs more rest than even us doctors expect."

Kelly nodded and turned his attention to Shay who was too quiet. "Hey, you okay?" He asked her concerned.

Shay nodded and let her tears fall for what felt like the hundredth time. "Gosh Kel I was so worried." She began, hugging him. "I got the call that you were being bought in and I just… I didn't know what to do. Chief said you were unconscious and they couldn't wake you and then I watched you get wheeled in and you just… you looked…"

"Dead?" Kelly asked realising how she was struggling to find the word to end her sentence.

Shay sniffled but nodded.

Matt cleared his throat. "You were talking, in your sleep. Were you dreaming about Andy?"

Kelly closed his eyes; there was no way that had been a dream. He'd had dreams of Andy, this was something else but he wasn't sure he wanted to go into details. "Yeah." He nodded not wanting to say too much.

"I have a few examinations I'd like to carry out on you if that's okay?" The doctor asked giving him a serious look.

"That's our cue to leave." Matt smiled looking at Kelly then the blonde paramedic.

Shay took a deep breath, leaving her best friend was the last thing she wanted to do.

"It won't take long." The doctor assured them offering a smile.

Kelly looked at Shay and didn't miss her hesitancy on leaving. "Hey, I'm okay. I'm not going anywhere, go get yourself a coffee or somethin'. You look more tired than I feel." He joked hoping it would ease her worry.

Shay smiled. "I'll be in the waiting room." She gently squeezed his hand and followed Matt towards the door. She didn't look back knowing if she did she would want to run back to his side.

Kelly closed his eyes; his smile disappeared once his friends had left the room. No need to put on a brave face anymore. When he opened his eyes again he saw his doctor watching him with a small frown.

"What?" Kelly asked frowning himself.

"Mr Severide.."

"Kelly."

"Kelly, I'm not sure who this Andy person is and I don't expect you to tell me but what your friend said was right. You were talking in your sleep, crying even. If you need to talk about this…"

"I'm fine doc." Kelly interrupted him. "Just a dream."

The doctor nodded picking up Kellys chart and writing a few notes. "Let's get these examinations done."

Matt and Leslie sat in the waiting room, it had been half an hour since they'd left Kellys room but to both it felt longer.

"The doc said it wouldn't take long." Shay complained throwing her coffee cup in the trash.

Matt put the leaflet down he'd been reading and looked at the clock for what felt like the hundredth time. Before he had chance to speak his phone began ringing. Taking it from his pocket he realised it was Chief Boden. "Hey Chief." He said answering it.

"Any more news on Kellys condition?" Boden asked.

"Well he finally woke up about half an hour ago but the docs checking him over so we're in the waiting room. I'll let you know as soon as we hear anything."

"How was he when he woke up?"

"He seemed okay, said he was tired. Think he'd been dreaming about Andy, he kept mentioning his name and got upset."

"It's understandable; today's a tough day for all of us. I'll stop by as soon as I can, in the meantime make sure he knows we're all thinking of him."

Matt smiled; he knew Kelly would know that already. The whole firehouse was one big family. "I'll tell him Chief, speak to you soon." After Bodens goodbye Matt hung up and placed his phone back in his pocket.

"Are you here for Mr Severide?" A young nurse asked approaching them.

"Yes." Shay said practically jumping from her chair.

"Doctor Jones sent me to tell you you're okay to go back in now."

"Thank you." Matt said smiling at the nurse.

Kelly gave the best smile he could when his friends returned to his room; he hoped it was believable to save them asking him questions.

Shays smiled matched his as she approached his bed and took his hand. "You okay? What did the doctor say?"

"He said my chests clear but I might have a cough for a while." Kelly told them honestly.

"When can you get out of here?" Matt asked him, noticing the doctor had left the room.

"Hopefully later on. Been here too long already." Kelly complained.

"Chief rang me just, said to let you know they're all thinking of you." Matt told him.

Kelly nodded. "I know."

Doctor Jones came back into the room with a coffee in one hand and Kellys chart in the other. "So Kelly, I've reviewed your results and I'm happy to tell you we won't be keeping you any longer. You're free to go, but if you have any problems at all I want you straight back here. I mean shortness of breath or chest pains, they are not to be ignored and I don't want you doing anything that may cause shortness of breath for at least the rest of the day."

"We'll keep an eye on him doc." Shay told him.

Kellys smiled turned genuine for the first time since waking up. "Thanks."

"You're welcome." Doctor Jones gave him a friendly nod. "I'll have the relevant paperwork waiting at reception."

As soon as the doctor removed the numerous amounts of wires snaking from Kellys body he was climbing out of bed. Matt and Shay were around him instantly.

"Take it easy." Shay warned him.

Kelly let out a sigh but slowed his movements. "I'm okay."

"Do you need any help getting dressed?" Matt reluctantly asked.

Kelly looked at him like he'd grown another head. "I think I got it." He said trying not to let his sarcasm seep through.

Shay had to hold back a laugh. She looked at Matt who was smiling. "I'll help; it's nothing I haven't seen before."

Kelly and Matt both looked at her with raised eyebrows.

"Hey we live together remember? And I've walked in on you plenty of times in the shower." Shay shrugged like it was no big deal.

Matt couldn't help it, he laughed.

"Just… turn around."

"Fine but if I hear a thud…" Shay joked facing the opposite wall with Matt.

Kelly shook his head but couldn't help the smile that grew on his face. The jokes were exactly what he needed and he was grateful his friends were there he just hoped he wouldn't fall off the bed and bare all to them.

**It made me giggle so I had to write that little bit in at the end. I can only imagine poor Kelly face planting and ending up showing his bare bum to his friends... embarrassing but funny lol thanks for reading.**


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